Agreeing to this suggestion from my husband: "Since we don't have sweet peppers for your pizza, how about I take the seeds and white part out of this jalapeno pepper I found in the fridge? Here, try a piece and tell me if it's too hot for you."
And then putting that tiny piece of pepper into my mouth, which is raw from constantly sucking on throat lozenges.
And then touching my face with the fingers that held that pepper. My raw-from-blowing-my-nose face.
When Chris says "Wow, even I can tell this is hot! How long as this pepper been in the fridge"? He who frequently gets offended by the fact that hot sauces he buys in the store aren't hot enough? He who drinks Tabasco sauce straight from the bottle as if it's water? When he's conceding that the peppers (even without the seeds) have become "medium-hot"?
(He then chopped up all the peppers and put them on his mini pizzas, after informing me that he decided not to make spicy pizza this time. By which he meant "I'm not going to add my special scary hot sauces to this pizza.)